Kinderson, 29, was performing an initial inspection of the highly acclaimed Go! Toys & Games store, wearing her normal less-than-arousing attire of a pleather jacket, silver eyeshadow, and clear braces. Unfortunately for her, the sales associate was highly trained as a student in the Peter J. Hejny School of Retail.
Witnessess claim that Kinderson approached the register after spending 15 minutes or so awkwardly thumbing her pockets in the back corner of the store while looking at her Miss Piggy watch. She is said to have requested a suggestion to the associate as to an appropriate party favor. He invited her to sample the various scented pencils (Smencils) on display near the register, all while his arms were meticulously folded across his chest. Kinderson mistook this gesture to be the look the weary salesman, briefly letting her guard down to tease some day-old tuna from a wired tooth, bringing the smencil up to her nose.
The sales associate is said to have seized this moment to leap over the cash register, perform the moonwalk, and then shove the pencil up Kinderson's nose. He screamed "Mr. Hedgeknee warned me about you" as she fell to the ground dead. The sales associate then proceeded to tell the corpse how he worked as a wildland firefighter last summer.
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